Dick Tracy Starring in Diamond Double-Cross

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Dick Tracy Starring in Diamond Double-Cross

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Diamond Double-Cross was a 28-minute production that featured 1940s inspired costumes and cityscapes and the primary color scheme from the Warren Beatty film. This show ran at the old Theater of the Stars near the Brown Derby restaurant from May 21, 1990-February 16, 1991. It was rushed into production before the film was even released in theaters (the film came out on June 15, 1990) and was one of the first projects of the so-called "Disney Decade."

The show director was Jess Ross and Tom Child was the writer. Stan Meyer was the art director and Matt West was the choreographer. The Calling Dick Tracy song was written by Tom Child and Don Harper. An identical show was also performed at Videopolis at Disneyland from June 15-December 31, 1990.

Dick Tracy Diamond Double Cross Costume sketches Disney MGM Studios

The Show Script

(Above the stage, a sign spells out “The Hideout” with a typewriter font and sound effects. Flattop and Mumbles are sitting at a table. Flattop points a Tommy gun at Mumbles and both are laughing. Big Boy Caprice comes in.)

Big Boy: Flattop! Mumbles! I've got a very important job for you.

Flattop: You can count on us, Big Boy.

(Mumbles is true to his name and mumbles something.)

Big Boy: What did he say?

Flattop: He said, “What’s the job, Boss?”

Big Boy: Oh. The job is this. My girl Breathless Mahoney has got her eyes on that world famous Balonian diamond, and you're gonna steal it for me. ‘Cause she ain’ gonna marry me unless she gets her mitts on that rock.

Flattop: We'll get it for you, Boss!

(Mumbles again says something incomprehensible.)

Big Boy: What did he say?

Flattop: He said it’s on display at the museum.

Big Boy: So what are you guys waiting around here for, huh? Get me that diamond!

(They pose in an exaggerated way as the scenery slides and the typewriter font on the sign spells out “museum”. People are gathered around a case with a cloth covering it.)

Woman Announcer: And now, to unveil the Balonian diamond, his majesty the king of Balonia, King Leopold the Third!

(King Leopold bows and waves,)

King Leopold: Thank you! On behalf of the queen and my fellow Balonians-

Queen: Alright already, Leo! (She knocks him down and goes toward the case to unveil the diamond.) The Balonian diamond!

(The crowd exclaims over the diamond.)

Crowd: Oh! Ooo! Wow! (Green smoke begins to fill up the inside of the case.) Ooo! Huh? What? Look! Hey! The diamond! It’s gone!

(The queen faints and the king catches her. The crowd begins to dance and sing.)

Crowd:

Something’s going on in the city,

turned upside-down by a criminal spree.

The diamond disappears in the city,

the scene of a robbery.

King Leopold (Sings.): The queen and I deserve the royal treatment. Instead we get this travesty.

Queen: The bonafide fool who pinched my jewel, will get a special present from her majesty.

Guard: It’s time to do something about it.

Crowd:

It’s time for us to make a call.

To the only man who can help us.

The greatest cop of them all.

Calling Dick Tracy.

It’s law and order time.

Calling Dick Tracy.

You'll make the punishment fit the crime.

When all is said and done, the fight for justice will be won.

By detective Dick Tracy,

with a clue and a Tommy gun.

(The scenery slides as Mumbles, Big Boy and Flattop walk out. Big Boy is holding the diamond.)

Big Boy: Being good is one thing, being bad is better.

Flattop: And mama always said to me, crime don't pay.

(Mumbles dances and mumbles something as he sings.)

Flattop (Sings): What he said Boss, “Our business is ok.”

Crowd:

It’s a scandal! An outrage! A terrible thing! A great new day gone totally sour and here’s one thing that we're happy about, thank goodness that rock wasn't ours.

It’s time to do something about it.

It’s time for us to make the call.

To the only man who can help us.

The greatest cop of them all.

Calling Dick Tracy.

He knows just what to do.

Calling Dick Tracy.

Do the crime and he'll be after you.

When all is said and done, the fight for justice will be won.

Justice will be won.

(Dick Tracy arrives on the stage.)

Dick (Speaks.): By detective Dick Tracy.

Crowd: With a clue and a Tommy gun. Calling. Calling Dick Tracy. Calling. Detective Dick Tracy. Calling. Calling Dick Tracy. Calling. Detective Dick Tracy. Calling Dick Tracy. Detective Dick Tracy. Calling Dick Tracy. Detective-

(Dick climbs a flight of stairs to a table and chairs where Tess Trueheart is waiting. The sign by the table says Mike’s Diner. Tess finishes the Crowd’s last sentence. The crowd continues to quietly chant “Calling Dick Tracy, Detective Dick Tracy in the background.)

Tess: Dick Tracy! You're late again.

Dick: Sorry Tess. I know, third time this week.

Tess: Aren't you working too hard? I worry about you.

Dick: I know Tess. But somebody’s gotta clean up this city.

Tess: You're the man to do it. Well, an evening here at Mike’s Diner is better than nothing.

Dick: I know it’s not the most romantic place Tess but there’s something I've been meaning to ask you.

Tess (Visibly excited): Oh yes Tracy?

Dick: I think it’s time you and I well we-

Tess: Go on, detective. Go on. (Sings.) Tracy I'm crazy for you. Though you stutter and stammer I know in my heart you'll come though. Until that special day, when I hear you say “I do”, there’s a place in my heart just for you.

Dick: What I mean to say is, Tess, isn't there a time we should-

(A ringing noise is heard and a sign comes down showing Dick’s Two-Way Wrist Radio.)

Chief Brandon (Voice): Calling Dick Tracy! Calling Dick Tracy! The Balonian Diamond has just been stolen from the museum! Calling Dick Tracy!

Dick (Into wrist.): I'm on my way. (To Tess). Tess, I've gotta go.

Tess: Where?

Dick: To the Club Ritz. Call it a hunch.

Tess: Club Ritz? I call it dangerous.

Dick: It comes with the territory Tess, I'm used to that. I'll be back.

Tess: Tracy! Be careful.

Dick (Running out of the diner): Order for me!

Dick Tracy Diamond Double Cross Show Disney MGM Studios

Crowd:

Time to do something about it.

It’s time for us to make a call.

To the only man who can help us.

The greatest cop of them all.

Calling Dick Tracy.

He knows just what to do.

Calling Dick Tracy.

Break the law and he'll come after you!

It’s time be calling Dick Tracy.

Dick: It’s law and order time.

Crowd:

Calling Dick Tracy.

Dick (To the King and Queen of Balonia): I'll make the punishment fit the crime.

Crowd:

When all is said and done, the fight for justice will be won.

Dick: I'm detective Dick Tracy.

Crowd: With a clue and a Tommy gun. Calling. Calling Dick Tracy. Calling. Detective Dick Tracy. Calling. Calling Dick Tracy.

(The scenery slides and Dick is outside the Club Ritz: A door slides open with the doorman’s face.)

Doorman: Password?

Dick: Eat lead.

(The door opens and the panels slide back to reveal the inside of the club.)

Cigarette Girl: Cigars! Cigarettes! Sen-Sen! Cigars. Cigarettes. Sen-Sen! Cigar, Mr. Tracy?

Dick: No thanks. Hey, have we met?

Cigarette Girl: Oh Mr. Tracy, everyone knows who you are.

(Flattop and Mumbles push Dick into a chair.)

Emcee: And now, the Club Ritz is proud to present the Fabulous Ritz Girls!

Ritz Girls:

Sooner or later you're gonna be mine.

Sooner or later you're gonna be fine.

Baby, it's time that you face it.

I always get my man.

Sooner or later you're gonna decide.

Sooner or later there's nowhere to hide.

Baby, it's time, so why waste it in chatter?

Let's settle the matter.

Baby, you're mine on a platter.

I always get my man.

She always gets her man.

Dick: Breathless Mahoney. Trouble with a capital “B”.

(The curtain rises to reveal Breathless. Flattop and Mumbles keep an eye on Dick as he sits as his table.)

Breathless:

Got my diamonds. Got my yacht, got a guy I adore.

I'm so happy with what I got, I want more!

Count your blessings, one, two, three.

I just hate keeping score.

Any number is fine with me.

As long as it's more!

One is fun, why not two?

And if you like two, you might as well have four.

And if you like four, why not a few.

Why not a slew.

More! More!

Each possession you possess,

helps your spirits to soar.

That's what's soothing about excess.

Never settle for something less.

Something's better than nothing, yes!

But nothing's better than more.

(Breathless goes over by Big Boy’s table as she is singing and then walks away. Big Boy then gets up and starts to give the Ritz Girls instructions on how to dance.)

Breathless and The Ritz Girls:

Nothing’s better than more.

More! More! More!

Nothing’s better than more.

Breathless: Well, you like what you've seen so far?

Dick: So far, so good.

Breathless: But I didn't say anything about being good. Perhaps a good detective would care to join me for a quick dance?

Dick: I don't dance.

Breathless: Well that’s ok, I'm hot to teach you.

Dick: Is it warm in here?

Breathless: So wouldn't you like to learn how to move?

Dick: I'm on duty.

Breathless: What a coincidence. So am I. (Sings.)

Count your blessings.

One, two three.

I just hate keeping score.

Any number is fine with me.

As long as it’s more.

As long as its-

(Breathless goes up to Big Boy.)

Breathless: Don't you have something for me?

Big Boy: I told you I'd get it and I did. Marry me, Mahoney and the diamond is yours.

Breathless: Is that a proposal? How romantic.

Big Boy: I'll get the diamond to you right now. Just say yes, Mahoney.

Breathless: What about Detective Tracy?

Big Boy: Don't worry about Tracy. My boys will make sure this is the last show he ever sees. Come on now, Mahoney, yes or no? I ain’ got all day.

Breathless: What a coincidence. Neither do I.

(Sings)

Each possession you possess,

helps your spirits to soar.

That's what's soothing about excess.

Never settle for something less.

Something's better than nothing, yes!

Ritz Girls:

But nothing's better than more.

She wants more!

She needs more!

She wants more!

Gotta have more!

We'll all have more!

More! More! More!

(The gang hassles Tracy and Big Boy presents the diamond to Breathless. She polishes it and holds it up.)

Breathless: Thank you. Girls, cover me!

(The Ritz Girls arm themselves with Tommy guns. Various people run by including Big Boy, Mumbles, Flattop, the King and Queen, the museum guards and the cigarette girl. Mumbles and Flattop try to grab Dick but he makes short work of them and calls into his two-way wrist radio.)

Dick: Calling all cars, Tracy here. Police back up needed at the Club Ritz.

Crowd: Raid! Raid! Raid!

(The sound of police sirens is heard.)

Cigarette Girl: Cigars? Cigarettes? Sen-Sen?

(Breathless runs by with the diamond. Two patrons dance by Dick.)

Dick: I don't dance.

(More club patrons dance with Big Boy. Breathless runs across the comic book skyline holding the diamond. Dick, the King and Queen and club patrons chase her, followed by the cigarette girl.)

Cigarette Girl: Cigars? Cigarettes? Sen-Sen?

(Tess arrives on the scene and follows the Ritz Girls. Breathless then gets hit on the head by two club patrons, who then take the diamond. Dick runs back out with Tess.)

Tess: Oh Tracy, this is dangerous.

Dick: Don't worry Tess, I'll protect you. I'm gonna crack this case.

Tess: I know you will Tracy. You always do.

(Everyone runs behind the comic book scenery including Breathless, club patrons and the King and Queen. The buildings part and Breathless is holding an ice pack on her head as the King talks to her.)

King: You ever date a King?

(Breathless hits him to the sound of cartoon sound effects.)

King: I have a big castle.

(Breathless hits him again.)

King: You're beautiful when you're-

(Breathless hits him with the ice pack before he has a chance to finish.)

King: -angry.

(Mumbles and Big Boy are searching for the diamond and bump into each other.)

Big Boy: Mumbles! Which way did they go?

(Mumbles says something and a cartoon bubble comes down over Big Boy with symbols to represent expletives.)

Cigarette Girl: Cigars? Cigarettes? Sen-Sen? (Dick walks past her.) Cigars? Cigarettes? Tracy? Ooooh! Cigars? Cigarettes?

Queen: Cigar please.

Cigarette Girl: Ten cents.

Queen: Hand it over!

(The photographer that was in the Club Ritz snaps pictures of the queen.)

Queen: That’s not my good side!

(The Cigarette Girl waves a flag and the Queen charges after the photographer. Breathless comes out with the King. They spot Big Boy with the diamond and run after him. The Ritz Girls run out on stage screaming. A painted comic book flat of a building slides out and the Queen of Balonia is climbing up the side and holding an airplane like King Kong. In some shows the Queen character actually clung to the side of the building. In other performances it was a painted flat. Club patrons hold newspapers up to their faces and dance. Big Boy, The King and Breathless also have newspapers. Everybody then turns over the papers to form the front page of “The Daily Daily” stating “Diamond Stolen!!! Tracy on the Case!” Tess comes out holding the diamond.)

Tess: Tracy, where are you? Look what I found!

(Flattop grabs it from her. Flattop runs across the skyline with the diamond and drops it. Everyone follows him and heading up the rear of the line is the cigarette girl.)

Cigarette Girl: Cigars! Cigarettes! Sen-Sen!

(Flattop runs to the front of his stage and one of the stage flats opens to signify he is safe in his hideout. Big Boy and Mumbles join him.)

Big Boy: They'll never find us here.

(Mumbles says something. Big Boy throws up his arms and doesn't bother to find out what he says.)

Big Boy: Flattop, give me the diamond.

Flattop: I don't know boss, it must've slipped. I dropped the diamond.

Big Boy: What do you mean you dropped it? I saw you with it. You had it in your hands.

(Breathless and the Ritz Girls show up. Breathless has a pink Tommy gun.)

Breathless: Alright boys, freeze.

Big Boy: Breathless!

(Big Boy moves toward her and the Ritz Girls aim guns at him.)

Big Boy: Breathless, doll. Baby.

Breathless: Can the jig music, Big Boy.

Big Boy: I don't get it. What about us?

Breathless: There never was an “us”. There’s a “me”. And a “you”. Give me the diamond or you will be eating lead!

(The king and queen run in.)

Queen: Alright chickie bird, reach for the sky! Up! Up! Up!

(The king raises his arms.)

Queen (to King): Not you. Where’s my diamond? Somebody better start talking!

(Amid the general confusion, Dick comes in holding his gun.)

Dick: I'll do the talking.

Queen: Fine.

Big Boy: So, Detective Tracy. What a surprise. And it ain’ even my birthday.

Dick: Save it for the trial Big Boy.

Big Boy: What did I do?

Dick: You stole the Balonian diamond.

Big Boy: I don't know what you're talking about Tracy. Ain’t no diamond here.

Dick: Wrong Big Boy. The Diamond is right here in this room and I know who’s got it.

Big Boy: What are you talking about Tracy?

Dick: Big Boy, you've been double-crossed.

Big Boy: Double-crossed? What are you talking about?

(Dick goes up to the Cigarette Girl and takes the diamond from her box and holds it up.)

Dick (To Cigarette Girl): I thought I recognized you. Big Boy, meet the mistress of disguise. Arch villainess Crewy Lou!

Crewy Lou: You got me this time, Tracy!

Dick: Clever Crewy Lou but not clever enough. You signaled your accomplice too many times.

Big Boy: Accomplice?

Dick: Flattop. He didn't drop that diamond on the rooftop Big Boy, he passed it to Crewy Lou!

Flattop: Nice going Crewy!

Dick: Boys, lock them up.

Big Boy: Dick, mind if I call you Dick? I didn't steal that diamond. Well, I stole it before but I didn't steal it this time. (As cops take him away.) I'm gonna crush your head Tracy! No, wait. I didn't mean that.

Breathless: So, I guess this means that your dance lesson will have to wait.

Dick: There isn't going to be a dance lesson, Breathless.

Breathless: I guess this means goodbye, Dick.

Dick: I have two questions. Why would a beautiful woman like you get mixed up in a racket like this?

Breathless: Well Tracy, I guess I'm just a material girl. (Note: This joke of course plays on the fact that Madonna played Breathless in the film.)

Dick: And my second question, Tess Trueheart, will you marry me?

Tess: Oh Tracy! I thought you'd never ask. I've been waiting for the longest- (She gets interrupted by Dick’s two-way wrist radio.)

Chief Brandon (Voice): Calling Dick Tracy! Calling Dick Tracy! Report to the Club Ritz immediately!

Dick: I'm on my way. (Turns to Tess.) Tess-

Tess: I know. Go get’em Tracy!

Dick: Tess, you're one in a million!

Crowd:

This time he’s done something about it.

He’s always here to answer a call.

He’s the only man who can help us.

The greatest cop of them all.

Calling Dick Tracy.

It’s law and order time.

Calling Dick Tracy.

You'll make the punishment fit the crime.

When all is said and done, the fight for justice has been won.

By Detective Dick Tracy.

With a clue and a Tommy gun.

When all is said and done, the fight for justice has been won.

(Dick leads Big Boy, Mumbles, Crewy Lou and Flattop to a police lineup.)

Dick: I'm detective Dick Tracy.

Crowd: With a clue and a Tommy Gun.

Calling. Calling Dick Tracy. Calling. Calling Dick Tracy. Calling. Calling Dick Tracy. Calling. Calling Dick Tracy. Calling.

(Dick turns around and shoots his name into the backdrop with his Tommy gun. This was actually a lighting effect.)

Crowd: Calling Dick Tracy.

Crowd:

Yesterday it seemed we never would smile again.

Didn't it?

Didn't matter what we ventured or how.

Looked as though the fun was over till who knows when.

That was then, this is now.

Back in business and ain’ it grand.

Let the good times roll.

Yesterday things were out of hand.

Now they're under control.

Back in business and overnight.

In demand.

Well alright.

Business is just dynamite.

Let the good times, forget about the bad times,

let the good times roll.

Yeah!

Disney-MGM Studios Shows

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See ya real soon!

Dick Tracy Diamond Double-Cross